To date or not to date............
Let's look at the dating scene, and see what's in it for the prospective dater. There must be something worthwhile. Right? Right.
First of all let's see what the dictionary has to say about the word date.
Date:
The Calendar: Time stated in terms of the day, month, and year.
A Point In Time: A particular point or period of time at which something happened or existed, or is expected to happen.
An Appointment: a luncheon date with a client; a date with destiny.
An Engagement: to go out socially with another person, often out of romantic interest.
A Person: One's companion on such an outing.
Well, (according to the definition), dating involves a calendar. For those actively involved, a day planner is recommended. The back of a gum wrapper can also work for those of us living in a limited, or dateless world. I have been in such a slump that my gum wrapper turned into a 2 year calendar. Hopefully it won't become a five year diary.
Dates are also defined as a point in time. I am going to assume that this refers to past dating experiences, along with dreams and fantasies about future dating experiences. Historically most dates seem to be pretty similar in content. You go somewhere, eat something, do something, and then go home. The significance here is that this date is accomplished with another person, and made memorable because of that. Even if it was the worst date of your life, you'll remember it, and guage other dates by it.
When I think of an appointment I think about going to see a dentist, doctor, or lawyer. None of these are high on my list of favorite things to do. You get poked, prodded, questioned, and harrassed. Appointments inevitably end up costing a pretty penny, and rarely fulfill any baser need. I have been on many dates of the same caliber. You either spend a great deal of time battling to save your virtue, or you end up spending the time fighting the need to fall asleep.
I always associated the word engagement with a really big diamond ring, and dreams of white satin, and bells chiming in the background. According to the dictionary an engagement doesn't have anything to do with all that. It's about meeting someone on a social level with the hope of romance. I looked up romance in the dictionary.
Romance: A love affair. Ardent emotional attachment or involvement between people. A strong, sometimes short-lived attachment, fascination, or enthusiasm for something.
That pretty much covered all my experiences in the romance field, (especially the short-lived part).
Finally we come to the person. A date is the person we have agreed to go out and spend time with. Usually they end up looking a lot less enticing by the end of the evening. The date who originally appeared to be Adonis turns into Frankenstein, the Wolfman, and Dracula all rolled into one. What initially seemed to be a witty, clever and charming personality soon resembles a cheese greater with your nerves being the cheese.
The worst possible scenerio is when your date turns out to be everything you hoped he'd be, and you fall short. When this happens you go home to a phone that never rings, eat chocolate, and think about buying another cat.
The Unrelationship Expert,
Candalee